...SiqueCountry...

...a world filled with depth of thought and simple (or complex) silliness...kids, men (loved and lost), school, work, play, politics, religion, anime (and hentai), cartoons and video games; private thoughts and public rants...welcome.

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Location: Austin, Texas, United States

A woman ahead of her time and for all time...I come before you strangely familiar...mother, former wife, friend, future wife, daughter...i shoot straight by way of riddles and can make boiling water a exercise of physics...carry a conversation from ed, edd and eddie to la blue girl, NFL to NRA, Jesus to Judas and everything in between. I'm an observer, and though I try not to judge I don't regret doing it...I listen with sincerity and very little shocks me...but many things surprise me. Let me entertain you, bored you, insult you, encourage you, make you laugh, make you think, make you cry, make you curse, and make you...well, let me tell you my story, a post at a time...

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Heaven

with my daughters almost 1800 miles away, I have had the time to rest and relax.

my idea of Heaven.

they call to report the ways that their Gran and their Great Gran has spoiled them (mostly clothing and school supplies) and spend their days in the yard running and causing random havoc.

their idea of Heaven.

the thought of having them away from me for so long broke my heart, and had me crying for the 24 since their departure, greiving their absence wanting to be safe and accepting that their lives was not in my hands for the time being.

I had to sharpen my faith...and accept that fact.

and once I did the most glorious thing happened.

...I slept like a baby...and woke up refreshed and ready to hear them on the phone without crying afterwards.

that's the point where I entered the pearly gates of my personal paradise...

Monday, June 06, 2005

a place of one's own...


I was banned from Jinge's home and from calling him for the week...while his parents are here...banned is harsh...he asked me not to call or come over...

hummmm.....

sounds like shit to me...but I stayed quiet and said 'okay'...wondering whether to think that he just wanted to be alone with his parents...

...or...

...or...hiding.

either me from them or ...

...or...

me from him.

a place of his own...away from the worrys that a girl in your life may bring...especially when the thing you fear the most is very near...

and very alluring...

or at least makes the thing you fear the most not so scary, even start to, in the farthest corner of your mind or heart, welcome the notion...

it can make anyone want to hide...and not want to be found...

but to be fair, I don't know the truth...I don't claim to know what creeps around in the minds of others...

but as the blog says, it is my world, a place of my own...where I puts the worrys that a guy in my life might bring...especially when the thing that I fear the most is very near...
















Sunday, June 05, 2005

9


...Tae...the little lady with the big smile...

my youngest daughter, Tae turned nine yesterday. In spite of the circumstances around her conception, she hasn't fail to bring sunshine and humor to my life...

...I hesitate to introduce you to my girls because they are close to my heart and I don't want to share them until I absolutely have to...

but they are soooo wonderful that I just can't help myself...

So, before I change my mind, a few facts about the world's greatest nine -year-old:

  • she was born in San Antonio, Tx, in a hospital that's catacorner to the enchilada red public library.
  • the surgeons were constantly hitting on my aunt, during surgery, yes while I was having her!
  • she was born with her thumb in her mouth...I thought something was wrong until the hospital staff went "awwwww" and held her up, her little thumb in, sucking away.
  • she didn't take that thumb out willing for a whole three years...she still sleeps with it, but don't tell anyone I told you, shhhhhh!
  • even though she can't carry a tune in a bucket, she sings constantly
  • she loves the Rolling Stones and the Beatles...(don't look at me...)
  • she loves to swim....
  • she will own you on Def Jam-Fight for New York...(yes, I know it has profanity in it )
  • she thought that the divorce meant that she could have my room....

a little bit about my little bit...HBH and grow big my loud, smiling loved one....